At a lost for words, and the funny thing is that it's okay.

I didn't know who to turn to on this matter and found myself here. I know the last entry was about words and how powerful they are, but I forget to mention that at times there are no words. There's no power because you're lost in the words you want to form. Sometimes you don't even know what words to form. That's me. I don't know what to say about it all. I can tell you the facts and what happened, but I can't form words around what I feel about it.

What little words I can form about is that I feel drained. I feel weak. I feel like I lost something. I did lose it. I know I can't go back. I'm conflicted.

Then the questions start to roll in. What have I gotten myself into? What can this possibly mean and lead to? How will I face it next? Will time allow it to be easier to adjust? and finally How do I feel about all of it?

They may be a string of letters to you...

Words. It's the most effective, direct way we communicate. Sure social analyst will say nonverbal cues like body language and facial expression are important, but what we say regardless of tone, pitch, or how we're crossing our arms at the time relays the core of the message.

"Stop." (firm)

"Sttooopp..come on.." (smiles)

"Stop please" (short, like when you're saying that's enough)

"Stop!" (quick, urgent)

Yes, it's true the way we say things can change what the meaning is completely. But stop means the same thing: to cease, discontinue, halt.

Words. Sure, they have an impact. They have the power to stir emotions: anger, joy, hurt, inspiration. Maybe that's why we hold such esteem to eloquent speakers in the past because words have the ability to bring unity. Words also have the power to threaten and destroy a person as well. Bullies who tease verbally have driven their victims to take their own lives. Words hold so much power that it can have the word "abuse" attached to it: verbal abuse. Some would argue that verbal abuse could do as much, if not more emotional damage than physical abuse.

Recently I experienced two very different conversations. The exchange of words in one was filled with longing, wishes, and hopes. The other left me confused, bothered, and hurt.

Be careful with what you say, because once it's out there you can't take it back. You can say "sorry", "I didn't mean it", "Let me take that back", but really... you can't take it back. What was said is out there and unless you can turn back time and do it over again, you really can't take it back. I guess the closest to that would be to use the "delete" button on your keyboard, but then again, what is once read is read, and even that you can't take back.

Maybe words can't break your bones, but it sure can leave a lasting impact.

They may be a string of letters to you, but put them together and make a word, a sentence, a paragraph, a speech and observe the power it has.

You probably don't know, but what you said meant so much.