Radical

Ironic that the last post dealt with change and how I despised the word at that time. well today is going to be about wanting change.

I'm tired of my routine and more than once have I felt wanting to be somewhere else, in a different point in my life. I'm tired of my crowd. I'm done with putting up a front. I'm strained from dealing with the same things. I'm bored doing what I'm doing at the place I am. I'm sick of taking the same route, and the fact that I can get to a place with my eyes closed. I'm tired of eating at the same local joints and going out to do the same things weekend after weekend. I want to go and be different. I want to wake up and be somewhere else, and be someone else. I want to feel fresh. I want to get lost. I want a new role. I want to meet people who challenge my perspectives and open my eyes to another side.

I think I feel this way because things around have begun to change. What I thought I knew, wasn't true. It's a huge disappoint, and to protect myself..with hesitation, I need to change. No matter how much I want things to be remembered and for it to stay that way, things keep tainting it. It's time for me to move on, but can I? We all hold on to a good memory i.e., the fourth of July at the beach before your grandma passed; late night procrastination; that one particular family dinner. Sometimes those memories can't be altered and sometimes they can. You find out that grandma already new it was her time at that particular fourth of July, the friend who spent time procrastinating with you got a D on her test, that family dinner was one of your last. When you find out new information about that memory, that memory, although in the past, can change your perception of it. Realization has occurred. That realization has been happening a great deal lately. Things you remembered aren't the exact way you'll remember them any more.

I'm tired of doing "business as usual". I'm done just going through the motions. I'm sick of dealing with people who can't see beyond than what's in front of them, or settle with what the world has to offer. I feel like I've been a vegetarian for years and finally realize that I want the taste of real meat, and none of that tofurkey stuff.

Lydia I challenge yourself to change. To be moved. I am motivating you to be different. Don't get caught up of the worldly matters, for they'll all fall and crumble. Look beyond what's near you and look towards what's around you. Open your eyes to opportunities that are given everyday. Humble yourself and serve others. Become selfless this year. Understand that their are greater things to be dealt with. When you become hopeless and lose faith, keep going. Strive for what's best. Learn to take risk and trust in Him. Offer everything, and you'll be given everything. Live with no regrets. He'll turn those wasted years. Give. Endure. For in the end, there will be no suffering. There will be a day when the burdens of the place will be no more, and I'll see Jesus face to face.