I'll take it

In midst of uncertainty, fear, and emptiness there are times, little breaks, of relief.

A smile, a nostalgic memory, a funny movie scene that brings a smirk, a book that stir your imagination, the thought of something impossible, finding money in your old winter jacket, hearing that your test got pushed back, someone who lets you cut in line at the grocery, a classmate vouching that you did your homework when really you didn't, a brief moment that makes you forget about your impending crisis; a break. I'll take it.

I feel so unstable, and scared, and overwhelmed that any break I can get, (even if it's just the simplest thing) I'll take it. It's like you're in the ocean and you're drowning and any ounce of breath you get is a relief. A break from completely giving in and surrendering to the oncoming waves.

I'm so thankful for the little relief I get, it's almost like torture. Like squeezing an air ball so hard that it is completely crushed by your hand and you open your palm just an inch and it begins to inflate again.

I'll take it, even the smallest gesture, I'll take it.