I don't know

I don't know how. I don't know when. I don't know what. I don't know who and I don't know where.

All I know is not here, not them, not me, not that, not this, not now, not later, and not this way.

It's so much easier to leave than stay, to forget than remember, to listen than speak, to nod than to say no, to be kind than angry, to show nothing, but feel everything.

I wish you could be stronger. I wish you knew your strength. I wish you knew how to make it on your own instead. I wish you knew that it's different nowadays. I wish you can do what you want to, without asking permission to. I wish you could be free. I wish you realized what power you possess. I wish you knew.

So what happens now? I can't help but become anxious about it all over again. Why can't I not be part of this anymore?