I get anxious a lot. It probably comes from over thinking. I woke up anxious, wanting to be unconscious again.
Lately, I seem to be having third person's perspective. When I'm conversing or with others, I have almost an out-of-body experience. It's a feeling of disconnect. I know what I'm saying and I'm paying attention, but I'm not there.
People know you, but they don't. They know how much you want them to know and at maximum they know what you know. I don't know much.
I want you to know. I want you to know everything. I wish I could explain to you who I am and where I'm at, but I can't. I can't form the words and when I open my mouth, it's merely to take a breath. I want to show you. I want to be comfortable around you to show you. I wish we didn't feel pressured to talk, but know enough of each other to understand our silence. I want to be real. I'm bored of using the same line. I wish we could talk about the elephant. I wish we didn't waste our time. I wish I knew you. I want you to see me.
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